Once you embrace your value, talents and strengths, it neutralizes when others think less of you.
Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn’t have the time to sit around and talk about you. What’s important to me is not others’ opinions of me, but what’s important to me is my opinion of myself. Jacci, If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind. As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are as I do what others say is irrelevant. You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.
Young Lady, Chasing a man and lying on him is not winning. The only thing you win is the loss of your dignity. Confidence is knowing your value, instead of expecting a man’s love to provide you with value. I looked at lady J in that window, oblivious to all the people around me and I stared and smiled that particular smile. You know that smile that seems to knock you and tell you Jacci how pathetic you are? That’s the smile I was smiling. Strong people have a strong sense of self-worth and self-awareness; they don’t need the approval of others. Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend. Remember, We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves my dear. Chasing a person doesn’t give you value or build values in you. You earn your value by chasing morality and practicing dignity.
Lady J, There will always be someone willing to hurt you, put you down, gossip about you, belittle your accomplishments and judge your soul. It is a fact that we all must face. However, if you realize that God is a best friend that stands beside you when others cast stones you will never be afraid, never feel worthless and never feel alone. I have no right to say or do anything that diminishes a individual in one’s own eyes. What matters is not what I think of them but what she thinks of herself. Hurting a man in his dignity is a crime. What people instinctively regard as cool is real power consistency. Pathetic is not cool. Being locked in a tragedy, but not knowing it. That’s lameness. Human beings like you J are like the screwed-up children of alcoholic parents in that way.
A competitive and insecure woman will tell you that “true love” is never giving up on someone you’re in love with. A confident and spiritual woman knows that “moving on” doesn’t mean you never loved someone. She realizes that letting go is what God needs her to do because both your happiness and hers requires taking different journeys for spiritual growth. Letting go is sometimes the hardest thing, but it is the most “real love” you will ever experience. It is difficult to make a man miserable while he feels worthy of himself and claims kindred to the great God who made him. You will never gain anyone’s approval by begging for it. When you stand confident in your own worth, respect follows.
If you learn to really sit with loneliness and embrace it for the gift that it is…an opportunity to get to know you, to learn how strong you really are, to depend on no one but you for your happiness you will realize that a little loneliness goes a long way in creating a richer, deeper, more vibrant and colorful you. Me Staying silent is like a slow growing cancer to the soul and a trait of a true coward. There is nothing intelligent about not standing up for yourself. You may not win every battle. However, everyone will at least know what you stood for me. Being brave enough to be alone frees you up to invite people into your life because you want them and not because you need them.
I have realized; it is during the times I am far outside my element that I experience myself the most. That I see and feel who I really am, the most! I think that’s what a comet is like, you see, a comet is born in the outer realms of the universe! But it’s only when it ventures too close to our sun or to other stars that it releases the blazing “tail” behind it and shoots brazen through the heavens! And meteors become sucked into our atmosphere before they burst like firecrackers and realize that they’re shooting stars! That’s why I enjoy taking myself out of my own element, my own comfort zone, and hurling myself out into the unknown. Because it’s during those scary moments, those unsure steps taken, that I am able to see that I’m like a comet hitting a new atmosphere: suddenly I illuminate magnificently and fire dusts begin to fall off of me! I discover a smile I didn’t know I had, I uncover a feeling that I didn’t know existed in me… I see myself. I’m a shooting star. A meteor shower. But I’m not going to die out. I guess I’m more like a comet then. I’m just going to keep on coming back. If you have to convince someone to stay with you then they have already left.
A diamond doesn’t start out polished and shining. It once was nothing special, but with enough pressure and time, becomes spectacular. I’m that diamond.